When God Doesn't Fix It Page 8
I know the plans I have for you . . . plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future. Then you will call on me and come and pray to me, and I will listen to you. You will seek me and find me when you seek me with all your heart (Jeremiah 29:11–13).
Just think about the plans that God worked through Joseph’s trials. If he had abandoned his faith when he was sold into slavery; if he’d given in to Potiphar’s wife; if he’d given up while in prison; if he’d lost hope when it seemed his friends forgot him; if he’d failed to forgive when his brothers presented themselves before him—then God wouldn’t have been able to do the extraordinary things he did through Joseph’s life and lineage. But Joseph did remain faithful, and each of us has been blessed as a result.
1. Read Genesis 45:1–11. The trials Joseph endured had come about not as a result of anything he had done but through the jealously, wrath, and neglect of others. In spite of this, how did Joseph see his situation? What greater purpose did he find in it?
2. What enabled Joseph to so completely forgive his brothers and want to provide for them?
3. Do you truly believe that God has “plans to prosper you and not to harm you” even in the midst of trying circumstances? What hope does Joseph’s story provide to you?
Day Four: An Access Point
In 2 Corinthians 9:8, Paul writes, “God is able to bless you abundantly, so that in all things at all times, having all that you need, you will abound in every good work.” In Ephesians 3:20–21, he adds, “Now to him who is able to do immeasurably more than all we ask or imagine, according to his power that is at work within us, to him be glory in the church and in Christ Jesus throughout all generations.” God gives us blessings to help us do his work for his glory.
We see this principle demonstrated in the life of Joseph. His trials were part of a bigger plan that he did not see unfolding until years after the event. And some of the effects of his faithfulness he did not even witness during his lifetime. That’s why our stories are so important. They’re part of a much bigger story—God’s story. While God doesn’t always answer our prayers the way we would like, he blesses us abundantly and gives us everything we need to abound in the good work he has for us. When we do, our story, like Joseph’s, will bring God glory because he can do immeasurably more than we ask or imagine.
Our brokenness is an access point into other people’s lives. “I know what you’re going through” is the only invitation we need to enter into someone else’s pain. When people ask, “How did you make it?” we can tell them that it is only by God’s grace we have survived. When we walk through trials, our example ministers more to other people than any compelling speech we might make. Our ministry becomes teaching others how we walked through loss, or through moral failures—someone else’s or our own.
Whatever it is that we’ve come through, we can believe that God will use all of it—and then we can help others see how God will use their brokenness as well.
1. Read James 1:2–4. According to James, why should we consider it “pure joy” when we face trials of many kinds?
2. What is the difference between being in denial about our problems and seeing how God could be using them to do a greater good?
3. How have your trials enabled you to empathize with the trials others are facing? How have you been able to use what you’ve gone through to point others to Christ?
Day Five: A Higher Perspective
Near the end of Joseph’s story, when his brothers and their families were all in Egypt, we read of the death of Joseph’s father. Joseph mourned for Jacob and then received permission from Pharaoh to bury him in Canaan. Once the burial was over, and everyone had returned to Egypt, Joseph’s brothers started to get nervous. “What if Joseph holds a grudge against us and pays us back for all the wrongs we did to him?” (Genesis 50:15).
So the brothers sent word to Joseph that before Jacob died, he had left instructions that Joseph was to forgive the brothers for the wrongs they had committed against him. When Joseph received this message, he wept and replied, “You intended to harm me, but God intended it for good to accomplish what is now being done, the saving of many lives” (verse 20). Joseph’s statement demonstrates his ability to see the trials he had endured at a deeper level. His story, broken as it was, had led to the salvation of many.
It’s interesting to note that God used Joseph even in the midst of his trials. We see this when he was in prison and interpreted dreams for the Pharaoh’s cupbearer and baker (see Genesis 40). When we’re in the midst of a trial, we often think that once we’re through it, then God can use our story. After we resolve our brokenness, we can use our story for him, because that’s when we’ll finally be whole and God can give us our next step in life. But the truth is that the next step after being broken is to allow God to use it. If we wait until there is resolution to our story, we’ll never tell our story. Or, if there is a resolution, and our current trial has ended, another chapter or another trial will soon start. So choosing to wait before using our brokenness to help someone else is, in effect, choosing not to use our brokenness.
Hurting people don’t live in the resolution of life. They live in the tension of a son who will never return home, a parent who refuses to see them, a friend who’s betrayed them. Hurting people walk through the mess. They swim in the brokenness. And with God’s help, they hope and pray to make it to the other side.
Simply put, that can also be your ministry. Your testimony can be telling people you’re not to the other side yet. You’re still fighting to get there. You can remind them that they aren’t in their brokenness alone. You can encourage them to turn to Jesus—because he is the one who is sustaining you, and they’ll never get to the other side without his help. On his own, the drowning man is weak. But when he looks to his Savior, even the drowning man has the potential to save himself and the others who call on his Savior. Knowing you’ve used your brokenness to save others from drowning in their trials is indeed a better broken.
When we take our eyes off ourselves and see how God has used us and our broken stories to minister to other people, we get to see what we were created to do. That gives us the true hope of heaven: knowing there is a Savior who saves us from this broken world and allows us to live in peace and joy for all eternity.
As the joyful guy in prison, the one with the thorn in his side, so aptly wrote: “For our light and momentary troubles are achieving for us an eternal glory that far outweighs them all. So we fix our eyes not on what is seen, but on what is unseen, since what is seen is temporary, but what is unseen is eternal” (2 Corinthians 4:17–18).
1. Read Genesis 50:15–21. Joseph had experienced many trials as a result of the brokenness of others, including his brothers that stood before him. At the end of his trials, how did he illustrate that he had arrived at a “better broken” place?
2. In 1 Thessalonians 5:18, Paul writes, “Give thanks in all circumstances; for this is God’s will for you in Christ Jesus.” How does focusing on the eternal instead of the temporary struggles of this life enable us to do this?
3. What is the “better broken” story that God has given you? How will you share that story with others to encourage them—even if you are still in the midst of a trial?
Small Group Leader Helps
If you are reading this, you have likely agreed to lead a group through When God Doesn’t Fix It. Thank you! What you have chosen to do is important, and much good fruit can come from studies like this. The rewards of being a leader are different from those of participating, and we hope you find your own walk with Jesus deepened by this experience.
When God Doesn’t Fix It is a five-session study built around video content and small-group interaction. As the group leader, imagine yourself as the host of a dinner party. Your job is to take care of your guests by managing all the behind-the-scenes details
so that as your guests arrive, they can focus on each other and on interaction around the topic.
As the group leader, your role is not to answer all the questions or reteach the content—the video, book, and study guide will do most of that work. Your job is to guide the experience and cultivate your small group into a kind of teaching community. This will make it a place for members to process, question, and reflect—not receive more instruction.
There are several elements in this leader’s guide that will help you as you structure your study and reflection time, so follow along and take advantage of each one.
Before You Begin
Before your first meeting, make sure the participants have a copy of this study guide so they can follow along and have their answers written out ahead of time. Alternately, you can hand out the study guides at your first meeting and give the group members some time to look over the material and ask any preliminary questions. During your first meeting, be sure to send a sheet around the room and have the members write down their name, phone number, and email address so you can keep in touch with them during the week.
Generally, the ideal size for a group is eight to ten people, which ensures everyone will have enough time to participate in discussions. If you have more people, you might want to break up the main group into smaller subgroups. Encourage those who show up at the first meeting to commit to attending the duration of the study, as this will help the group members get to know each other, create stability for the group, and help you know how to prepare each week.
Each of the sessions begins with an opening illustration. The choice of questions that follow serve as an icebreaker to get the group members thinking about the topic at hand. Some people may want to tell a long story in response to one of these questions, but the goal is to keep the answers brief. Ideally, you want everyone in the group to get a chance to answer, so try to keep the responses to a minute or less. If you have talkative group members, say up front that everyone needs to limit his or her answer to one minute.
Give the group members a chance to answer, but tell them to feel free to pass if they wish. With the rest of the study, it’s generally not a good idea to have everyone answer every question—a free-flowing discussion is more desirable. But with the opening icebreaker questions, you can go around the circle. Encourage shy people to share, but don’t force them.
Before your first meeting, let the group members know that each session contains five days’ worth of Bible study and reflection materials that they can complete during the week. While this is an optional exercise, it will help the members cement the concepts presented during the group study time and encourage them to spend time each day in God’s Word. Also invite them to bring any questions and insights they uncovered while reading to your next meeting, especially if they had a breakthrough moment or if they didn’t understand something.
Weekly Preparation
As the leader, there are a few things you should do to prepare for each meeting:
• Read through the session. This will help you to become familiar with the content and know how to structure the discussion times.
• Decide which questions you definitely want to discuss. Based on the amount and length of group discussion, you may not be able to get through all of the “Bible study and video discussion” questions, so choose four to five questions that you definitely want to cover.
• Be familiar with the questions you want to discuss. When the group meets you’ll be watching the clock, so you want to make sure you are familiar with the questions you have selected. In this way, you’ll ensure you have the material more deeply in your mind than your group members.
• Pray for your group. Pray for your group members throughout the week and ask God to lead them as they study his Word.
• Bring extra supplies to your meeting. The members should bring their own pens for writing notes, but it’s a good idea to have extras available for those who forget. You may also want to bring paper and additional Bibles.
Note that in many cases there will be no one “right” answer to the question. Answers will vary, especially when the group members are being asked to share their personal experiences.
Structuring the Discussion Time
You will need to determine with your group how long you want to meet each week so you can plan your time accordingly. Generally, most groups like to meet for either sixty minutes or ninety minutes, so you could use one of the following schedules:
Section 60 Minutes 90 Minutes
WELCOME (members arrive and get settled) 5 minutes 10 minutes
TALK ABOUT IT (discuss one of the two opening questions for the session) 10 minutes 15 minutes
VIDEO (watch the teaching material together and take notes) 15 minutes 15 minutes
DISCUSSION (discuss the Bible study questions you selected ahead of time) 25 minutes 40 minutes
PRAYER/CLOSING (pray together as a group and dismiss) 5 minutes 10 minutes
As the group leader, it is up to you to keep track of the time and keep things moving along according to your schedule. You might want to set a timer for each segment so both you and the group members know when your time is up. (Note that there are some good phone apps for timers that play a gentle chime or other pleasant sound instead of a disruptive noise.)
Don’t be concerned if the group members are quiet or slow to share. People are often quiet when they are pulling together their ideas, and this might be a new experience for them. Just ask a question and let it hang in the air until someone shares. You can then say, “Thank you. What about others? What came to you when you watched that portion of the video?”
Group Dynamics
Leading a group through When God Doesn’t Fix It will prove to be highly rewarding both to you and your group members. However, this doesn’t mean you will not encounter any challenges along the way! Discussions can get off track. Group members may not be sensitive to the needs and ideas of others. Some might worry they will be expected to talk about matters that make them feel awkward. Others may express comments that result in disagreements. To help ease this strain on you and the group, consider the following ground rules:
• When someone raises a question or comment that is off the main topic, suggest you deal with it another time, or, if you feel led to go in that direction, let the group know you will be spending some time discussing it.
• If someone asks a question you don’t know how to answer, admit it and move on. At your discretion, feel free to invite group members to comment on questions that call for personal experience.
• If you find one or two people are dominating the discussion time, direct a few questions to others in the group. Outside the main group time, ask the more dominating members to help you draw out the quieter ones. Work to make them a part of the solution instead of the problem.
• When a disagreement occurs, encourage the group members to process the matter in love. Encourage those on opposite sides to restate what they heard the other side say about the matter, and then invite each side to evaluate if that perception is accurate. Lead the group in examining other Scriptures related to the topic and look for common ground.
When any of these issues arise, encourage your group members to follow these words from the Bible: “Love one another” (John 13:34), “If it is possible, as far as it depends on you, live at peace with everyone” (Romans 12:18), and “Be quick to listen, slow to speak and slow to become angry” (James 1:19). This will make your group time more rewarding and beneficial for everyone who attends.
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